Wednesday, July 28, 2010

ZEN ME BAN

160th post! :D
I don't know what is freaking wrong with this week or what's even wrong with me? I feel like I've been down since weekend and I can't shake the feeling off no matter how hard I try to channel my thoughts on other stuffs. Ugh.

Maybe this is what you get when you don't attend mass on a Sunday. I admit, I was kind of lazy to go to mass last Sunday for two reasons. First, it's raining hard and second, I was alone at home.

I wasn't productive last weekend even though in my mind, I knew I had tons of things to do.

Oh wait, now I realize when everything just started to feel wrong. I woke up pretty late last Monday and I can't even go back to my usual schedule. Damn.

What to do? What to do?

I'm so freaking messed up that even reading can't pick me up anymore.

Gaaaadddd, I'm so frustrated.

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

BOREDOM BLUES

I was bored in my only class today so I just decided to write a song but I couldn't get a feel of a chorus so I just wrote down anything that comes on my head since the lecture isn't helping in any way.
So.So.So.
I've been dying to write another song in ages and you need a strong emotion to make one. Maybe this feeling isn't so strong yet that's why I can't complete it.
NO TITLE YET.

I talked to my heart this morning
I've done nothing but some convincing
That I'm over you
I hope I'm over you

I took a step to move forward
Then you said something awkward
It pulled my heart back to you
I wished I just ran away from you

I looked at my face in the mirror
Looking for the traces of horror
Of the only thing you left in me
Why don't you just let me be

--so there is where I keep myself hanging from the words that this certain feeling holds. I can't finish it and find the right words for it. I hope that I can make a really good chorus for this one.

I should be studying by now.

:)ayeenatienza

PS: Oooohh, maybe I should entitle this one as "Step and Set Back."

:|

Sunday, July 11, 2010

PICK ME UP HERE

This is the book my mom has bought me after I had a very very tough moment in my life. At first, I was insanely mad with her for buying me such an expensive book. I thought I already knew its contents but I was wrong. This book, “Your best Life Now: 7 Steps to Living at Your Full Potential” by Joel Osteen, is now officially my pick-me-upper book. Everytime I feel down and I feel like I’m going to back to my old self, who sees everything on the negative side of life, I just read this book. It always reminds me on who I want to be and it teaches me on how to get there. It’s all about the positivity!

I’m just halfway through the book. Chapter 4 talks about letting go of the past. I used to be one of those people who hang on to their sadness because the drama gets sympathy from people. I realized that I don’t need drama. The drama has dragged me down already and it’s about time to pick myself up and make a further step to the future. I’m so thankful that this book is now in my hands. It has been helping me for the past couple of months.

What’s your ultimate pick-me-upper?



Friday, July 2, 2010

FIXED AT ZERO.

VersaEmerge's latest album, Fixed at Zero. This is the latest music in my ears.
Sierra's lyrics hit me like a ball that I felt it in every nerve of my system. I could relate to some of the songs specially, "You'll Never Know". It felt like resisting into something that you know you've already fallen into. "Fixed at Zero" describes my life for the past years. Doing everything you can and still not moving forward. "Mind Reader" is IN MY OPINION, someone about who knows your moves, someone who thinks they know you too well but they don't. Someone who does the decision for you, the choices for you but for all they know you just want to head to the opposite side.
This album is really rocking. It has been a week and I'm still hanging onto it. I hope I could memorize any of the songs through repetition of playing.

Go Download their album or buy it in iTunes! These people are really great artists!

Life songs > Love songs

:)ayeenatienza

IT'S MORE THAN EENIE MEENIE

I'm a very indecisive person, well I'm a girl so basically I have the right to be one. I say my plans out loud but in my head there's a louder voice saying I'm not going to do those things that I said. It's not that I can't, I just don't want to.

Here's the thing. I believe that every time I feel like I'm alone or left behind, I always go back to something I used to do. Something that makes me happy that makes me forget that I was left behind. I just want to slap in their faces that they shouldn't be doing this to me because I am more than what they think I am. They can go ahead but I'll make sure they don't leave me behind cause I'm always prepared to haunt them down and remind them of the hurt that they have done to me.

That's how I've always been.

LOOKLET FEVER

My work just won't save that's why I just keep on printing the screen.
My Second looklet design. Something that I would definitely wear for school! Very casual! :)

SCHOOL RUSH:
Grab anything from your closet when you're late for school.

Thursday, July 1, 2010

NOT MYSELF TONIGHT.

I know, I should be finishing our laboratory report but I chose to be swayed by my dear friend, Anna. She told me about this website and I swear that I resisted to visit it. Then she said about something that I can't remember anymore and next thing I know I'm already obsessed with it.
I'M SO SORRY for my weakness. Who can blame me? I'm just a girl staring at looklet.com wondering when can I have those clothes?

So just for trial, I made my first design or first mix or first whatever you call it.


So I just print screened it cause I can't wait for it to save. I entitled it "First" because I can't think of anything else right now aside from the fact that my laboratory report is hanging. Oh, well.